Men Are Reaching Burnout – Is Self-Care The Solution?

“I don’t think enough men even consider self-care, let alone practise it,” says Kenny Mammarella-D’Cruz, who runs a series of men’s talking groups called MenSpeak and believes that wellness is gendered, with serious implications for men. “The figures tell us that more men die by suicide, commit more crimes, have a higher addiction and abuse rate, can more easily isolate – and so many lives could be saved if only men talked about it.”

In the UK, men are three times as likely to take their own lives than women. Self-care isn’t a solution to an issue as complex as male suicide, of course, but finding strategies to boost men’s mental wellbeing certainly has its part to play. Even the NHS recognises the power of self-care with Professor Jane Cummings, chief nursing officer for England, saying it is “vitally important”.

One person trying to address the gender divide when it comes to wellness is Martin Robinson, editor and founder of The Book of Man, who runs a support network offering advice and inspiration to men “in a time of great change”. Key to his approach is getting men to question masculinity and what it means to be a man.

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“Traditionally men haven’t been equipped in the right way – certainly men have been conditioned to not value communication or emotional openness in the same way as women,” says Robinson, who is encouraging men to open up in his weekly Sunday self-care sessions in London, which always sell out and are currently part of a bigger, three-month Festival of New Masculinity. 

“They’re about having some brunch and maybe some beer,” he explains, “so it’s not the healthiest. But they’re also about gathering to talk about wellbeing issues that men don’t usually discuss. We make the format fun and accessible, knowing there’s still a way to go before such discussions are the norm.”

A recent meet-up saw Professor Green discuss his love of candles and speak about his self-care rituals. “For men in the public eye to talk about such things would have been unthinkable 10, maybe even five, years ago,” Robinson says.