The Farewell, Midsommar, The Nightingale And Necessary Conversations About How We Process Grief

One of the most horrifying moments in The Nightingale is when a young Irish woman (Aisling Franciosi) is raped by several men, who then murder her husband (Michael Sheasby) and infant right in front of her. It’s a brutal scene and grips audiences with rage and an overwhelming agony — feelings all too familiar in today’s news cycle.

From the abortion bans to the mass shootings to the sudden deaths of beloved celebrities, it seems like we are in a perpetual state of mourning. We share the traumatic news on social media, which only ensures that we are all equally paralysed by it. Though platforms like Twitter and Facebook have given us spaces to collectively discuss our morose mood, we’ve done ourselves a disservice by not allowing ourselves to process our grief, several mental health professionals told HuffPost.

“Nobody’s talking about that side of it,” said psychotherapist Courtney Glashow, owner of Anchor Therapy in New Jersey. “It’s all, ‘Oh, my God, Donald Trump just said this,’ or, ‘He’s putting children in [cages] and no one’s helping’. No one’s saying, ‘Let me take a minute to process this and see how this emotionally affects me and my life’.”

Though some films, like The Nightingale, offer support for their actors by having a psychologist on set while shooting traumatising scenes, audiences remain susceptible to the dismaying images. That’s why therapists like Glashow, who treat many clients dealing with triggers of grief and trauma, point to recent films that have shown characters actually navigating the impact of grief such as The Nightingale, Someone Great, Midsommar, The Farewell and others.

Some of these narratives warn us of the damaging toll grief can take on our mental health. Others remind us how compassion is crucial in a world that seems devoid of it. At their best, these films — transcendent of race, age, culture and genre — help crystalise grief so we can be proactive about our own.